A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. ~Anonymous
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For years now, I have had issues with New Years Resolutions.
- Why do resolutions only exist when the calendar changes years?
- Why aren’t resolutions an active part of our lives no matter what time of the year it is?
- Why do we take resolutions so lightly?
As you can tell, I have questioned the whole idea for quite some time. However, this year is different for me. How you ask? My New Years Resolution is to give resolutions another chance.
A Resolution: The Rise & Fall
Do you ever just think about why we do the things we do? Often, there is no rationale. Even more often, the rationale is because we were told to do something. Being told to do something can be much more harmful to our predicament than approaching the action with a reasoning.
I’d honestly like to know when and where the resolution was started. Obviously, the act of resolving something dates back to the existence of man and it can be done at any time, not just at the end/beginning of a calendar year. However, the idea of a resolution must have had a start somewhere. Maybe the more fascinating question would be, “When did society start taking resolutions so lightly?”
The fall of resolutions must have happened fairly easily. Those who set and failed at resolving something in their life were quickly consoled by others who did the same. The consoling of such led to society, unfortunately, making failure at achieving positive life-altering results acceptable. Once half-hearted effort became acceptable, the power of resolve was lost.
Today, resolutions are as meaningless as ever. Yet, their intent and purpose is as meaningful as ever. Not often is it that we find something can have negative and positive connotations in it’s sole existence.
A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on. – John F. Kennedy
I’d like to think that resolve is not simply a man or nation that may rise or fall, but as an idea, an approach whose potential still exists no matter the action we fail to take.
(If You’ve Been Glazing Over This Article…Please Pay Attention to the Following!!!)
Why We Fail at Resolutions
So, what do we do about this? We can change the negative results of many failed resolutions simply by approaching them differently.
- “I want to be a healthier mom that can play with my kids thus I go to the gym.”
- “I want to have better communication with my wife thus we talk for 30 minutes nightly.”
- “I want to improve my outlook on life and the possibilities out there thus I remove negativity from my speech.”
If we look at each of these proposed desires, they lack the same focus of a resolution. A resolution tends to focus on the negative thing first, whereas this approach focuses on the positive aspects for one’s reason for change giving positive appeal more bearing to the resolution.
To resolve that which we want to change, we need look at the goal at the top of the mountain and not the climb to get there. The climb is just an obstacle. The obstacle is nothing unless you make it about the obstacle.
We fail at resolutions because we make it about the obstacle and not the reasoning for the change.
I am a simple man so I have broke this down to the following so as to help focus on my resolution/change approach:
My Approach: Positive Reasoning Thus a Specific Action
Commonly Failed Approach: Negative Action Begets a Positive Result
Turning a Leaf on Resolutions
Resolutions are amazing. They are the act of recognizing that someone wants to change something in their life because they have decided their current approach is not improving their life. Recognizing that change is a necessity in all of our lives can be a struggle. However, we must always see that change is necessary as we grow.
For the positive impact resolutions have in turning a new leaf on poor choices, habits, lifestyles, I am taking a new approach to them myself by turning a leaf and giving them a second chance.
I ask that you too do the same.
Here’s the Catch…There’s Always a Catch
Our actions and sincerity must change in regards to resolutions. We have taken resolutions and the incredible possibility of their being and watered them down. We have made these promises to ourselves, our families and our friends. Yet, time and again, we let the possibility of real change slip from our grasp because of our neglect to actually following through with major life changes.
So, what’s the catch?
The catch is that for each resolution you make this year, you must commit one meaningful material/experience that you will rid from your life if you should give up on your resolution.
Most would see this as another way of approaching minimalism or simplifying. However, this is the furthest from it. This is saying, “I will give up something I love, if I do not make this change that I deem necessary to my life.” Minimalism is the act of reducing that which you do not love. This choice to put something that you love on the line because you know you need this change has more of an impact on one’s life than the act of minimalizing has upon it.
Now, I want to clarify. The approach should still be the same. You should still say to yourself, “I want to improve my outlook on life and the possibilities out there thus I remove negativity from my speech,” but you follow that with, “If I do not give a full faith effort to this cause, I will give up ____________.”
As you can tell, we are moving further from the simple resolution of “I want to lose weight (or whatever).” We now have provided first a positive desire, second a specific action that leads to the positive want, and third a punishment, if you will, for not giving that full faith effort to obtain one’s desire.
The third point brings about a key aspect that we often overlook. Failure to achieve something is acceptable. Not committing all heart, passion, and action is not. The third point makes not that the penalty only comes upon not giving 100% of oneself to the cause. This last point comes down to you. You are the only one who can fully say whether you commit yourself fully to this resolution. That is a truth that can only be found from within.
Resolution Success
A few months back, Courtney Carver of Be More With Less started Minimalist Fashion Project 333. It started as one woman’s call to action of herself and her readers to resolve the clothing clutter in their lives. It has become so much more through a positive desire first and foremost, rather than a focus on the negative side of reducing the comfort of having options.
Just by reading a portion of the opening paragraph to Project 333, the positive feel is present:
…my closet looks bare, simple and surprisingly, inspiring. - Courtney Carver
Carver’s approach has not only led her to make a positive change she wanted, but has changed the approach of 40+ bloggers and hundreds (guessing?!) others. And this all started by focusing on the positive.
The success of your resolution can be similar to Courtney’s. You just have to adjust the approach you have taken towards resolutions for years and flip it on it’s head. I promise, the results will be much more what you original set out to accomplish.
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Schucks...This one is super unique. No similar posts.
